Let it be known I am a nitpicker. No matter what you give me, I will find some small flaw to ruin it. That's why my parents gave up on buying me gifts by age 9; because they always got me the crappy HotWheels, and because I hated those fucking matchbox cars. I guess this is my never-ending search for the perfect Metal album. I've yet to find it, but when I do, guarantee this fact - you will all be informed. Or maybe I'm just a cynical asshole.

SACRED HEART, a Power Metal Band hailing from America, seems to no longer exist. In fact, I was hard-pressed to find anything about this band on any of the usual websites. Wikipedia yields an article about the heart of Saint Mary (or some religious hoo-haa, I didn't read it), and Google searches were more of a mess then the aftermath of the turd parade. Hence, I can only assume this outfit is naming itself after DIO's 1985 album.

Admittedly, Power Metal has never been my thing, along with Metalcore, Deathcore, Hair Metal, Glam Metal, and caramel. DIO usually gets a pardon in this fashion, because it's fucking DIO. And because if you hate DIO, then be prepared to get the sissy-fit of your life from every older Metalhead who hears you (like downplaying Dimebag Darrell or PANTERA for any reason, no matter how good of a reason it may be). SACRED HEART hasn't quite earned that pardon; I'm relatively indifferent to say.

As you should know, what makes Power Metal what it is simple: operatic vocals, humungous power chords, and dancing triplets aplenty. SACRED HEART seems to be in a weird neutral zone, combining power Metal-ly vocals with Hair Metal-type, upbeat, major key riffages. Yet, they do contain several definitive Power Metal songs, even going as far as to bust out the keyboard. Nothing's more powerful than the motherfucking keyboard, not even a gun.

To be honest, I feel trapped. The music itself is perfectly fine at doing what it's trying to do, but to me it simply sounds like an over-the-top fantasy Rock album that's trying too hard to be epic. Simply put, it's pretty damn lame. In any good musical endeavour, it will end up as being more than the sum of its parts. That's why albums like "...And Justice For All" are hailed as masterpieces, despite looming criticisms I shouldn't even need to name specifically. For me, this album is almost the opposite. It has some set pieces I really loved: riffs that I thought were very well written, bass fills I enjoyed and other kicks that stayed with me for quite a bit. But as a whole, they seemed to lose me in the fog of songs about nothing in particular and a vocalist that sings his heart out on every measure, and every other measure (which is exhausting), and that keyboards that's just too damn powerful for my tastes.

So, I'm left in a weird funk state once again. I can't really think of one single number that will adequately sum up my feelings for this album. I was thinking of Pi, 3.14, but that's probably my hunger kicking in. So a solid 6 will do, I guess.