I always like to start out my reviews with a joke. Mostly because I'm terrible with opening statements, and also because it breaks up any awkward sexual tension we may both be feeling. But I can't think of anything funny at the moment, so fuck it. Let's dive right in.

DEADBORN has struck again, following their 2007 release, "Stigma Eternal", they've returned from wherever they usually are with their newest creation: "Mayhem Maniac Machine". And besides adding a healthy dose of alliteration, it also boasts new music! That's good, because alliteration alone won't save you, unless from some abstract super-villain who's undone by words with the same first letter.

This album is one of those technical Death Metal types, so expect plenty of technical, Death Metal-ly riffs. To put it bluntly, these are the riffs you probably won't be able to learn yourself easily, if at all. And blast beats, lots of blast beats. To be fair, it's pretty good stuff. I really enjoyed quite a bit off this album; "Slaves of Megatron" was probably a favourite for me for no particular reason other than that it's really good. The vocal work is not my particular bowl of weed, a little too guttural for my tastes. I like my Death Metal growls to sound more like DEATH's "Spiritual Healing" than CANNIBAL CORPSE's anything. It is a very subtle thing to nitpick on, I understand, but I'm allowed to be petty. And I will be.

Having said that, let me point out another nit to pick: they have no bassist. Why? I don't know! But the line-up lists three guitarists (one of whom does vocal duties), and no bassist. No bassist? What crime is this? Think you can slip that past me, did you? No. No, no, no, no, no. NO. Technical Death Metal needs a good bassist. Listen to OBSCURA's "Omnivium"and tell me they didn't need Jeroen Paul Thesseling and his fretless mastery. Maybe they think it's not necessary, but I will say "Fuck you, it's necessary!" Metal bands need to stop downsizing the position bass has in music. Fine, you can get away without it, for a bit. But soon those of us with an appreciation for the instrument and pitchforks will head your way, piss on your face, and burn your house down. And if you have any small pets, we'll take those, too.

So, we are left with really, really good Death Metal with a crucial element left behind like an unwanted puppy in a cardboard box while the family drives off in the minivan. But, to be fair, it's still good. It's a painting that, while the artist did accidentally slip on a banana peel and smear a brown smudge across the canvas, the rest of the un-smudged work is still well done, inspiring, and worth listening to multiple times. Some of the riffs within are, simply put, fucking awesome, and so I can at least look past the lack of a low end upkeep for a while before I ache for a bass line.

Also, the drumming deserves top marks for doing a great job creating crafty lines, despite lacking a certain rhythmic partner. I'll be honest, drums aren't really where I spend the most time critiquing, because all you really need is a good time-keeper and a kicksnare. Speaking of kicksnare, why does it sound like shit, especially compared to everything else? It reminds me of one of those empty, up-turned buckets you see street performers use as bongos while they wait for your change. No, I'm Not Giving You A Dollar!

But get a good fucking bassist, and I'd throw you a couple quarters, and a 9.