John K. of Biomechanical

Holiday Special

What would Biomechanical's singer do if he found out his girlfriend was bisexual? What song would he play in order to escape the vicious aliens that would have (theoretically speaking) abducted him? Are Star Wars' first two episodes better than Revenge Of The Sith? Let's find out...

By Orpheus Spiliotopoulos

• December 11, 2005

Who was the last person you spoke to on the phone before answering these questions?...

Chris Webb [guitarist]. He told me that PRS will build a signature 7 string!! Good stuff! (Laughs)

Are you a good cook? If you had us over for lunch, what would you cook for us?

I suck at it man, I can do eggs and chips but that just about it!!!

If you weren't a musician, what do you think you'd be?

A drummer, he he just kiddin'! I loved astronomy when I was a kid; I'd probably try and do something like that (I'd attempt to do it, no idea if I could get to become a professional astronomer, probably would end up having a telescope in my shed).

Do you like extreme sports? If so, is there an extreme sport you like doing in your spare time and what is that?

You kidding? I am the least sporting person on the planet. The most exercise I get is headbanging - if that was a sport then fuck yeah!

Do you like ordinary sports? If so, what's your favorite team (if any)?

Not into football I'm afraid, dude!

Your top-3 favorite movies of all time are?

(man that's hard, there are a lot of movies I love!!)

Star wars V: The Empire Strikes Back
Lord of the rings: The Fellowship of the Ring
Matrix Revolutions

What do you have in your pockets right now?

An inflatable PA system. I can't go anywhere without it!!...erm ...nothing.

Have you ever been to a beach full of nudists? What was it like and were you one of them?

What in the shit?? No dude...no, it sounds great until you get there and all images of beauty and sexual desire are shattered by what can only be described as a site fit for a National Geographic documentary...not my thing man, sorry.

Band/Artist you'd love to be trapped with inside an elevator.

John Williams, the composer (any chance we could have a piano in there too??).

If aliens ever abducted you, what song would you play for them?

The Ketchup Song. It would make them puke uncontrollably and this would give me the chance to escape before the anal probing begins!!

What's under your bed?

Books, bags and a corpse.

Your girlfriend turns out to be gay. Your reaction would be?

I would invite her girlfriend to make out. (Laughs)

A Metal/Rock album that everybody loves but you hate.

The first The Darkness album sits on my nerves but hey what can you do?

Do you have any phobia? And what is that?

I don't (I think so).

The most ridiculous thing you have ever done because you were drunk.

Ahhh, trust me I don't get drunk too often but I have my share of doing ridiculous things.

Have you ever done anything that made you feel terribly guilty afterwards?

Yeah, putting this band together! (Laughs)

When was the last time you got pissed off at a friend of yours and why was that?

Well, don't have time for hanging out with people but I would consider my band members as my friends, haven't had a serious situation though so, I can't remember when I was last really pissed off at a friend.

Have you ever been in jail? What for?

Nope, not good for my gangsta rap image, I know...

If they would offer you a role in an all-star celebrity reality show, would you accept? Who would the top 3 of celebrities be that you would like to have along with you? And who would be the top 3 celebrities that you would ABSOLUTELY NOT want in it?

Yeah I would, it would be a good laugh.

Jim Carrey, Jack Black and George Lucas (so I can kick his butt for making two OK movies before coming to his senses and releasing Revenge of the Sith).

I wouldn't like to be in the show with Enrique Iglesias, Ricky Martin and Liam Gallagher.

Your wish for 2006...

Don't mean to sound like Mary Freebush but I would like some world piece for God's sake!

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