Sometimes, as a writer, you end up facing an album so catastrophically inane, so confusing and inaudiable, so unbelievably abysmal and detached, that you end up spending days just coming up with the words and phrases to depict it. TODAY IS THE DAY's "No Good To Anyone" is, unfortunately, such an album. Based in Orland, Maine, Steve Austin, the single man operating the cranes behind the project, wrote an overwhelming amount of 14 tracks for which he laid down layers and layers of neverending noises, that really does make you question, had he foreseen that his record is to be, quite ironically and literally, 'no good to anyone'?

Wielding a wide array of genres to his account that surge between Black Metal, Psychedelic Rock and Shoegaze Noise, Austin managed to captivate none - not a single faultless moment was delievered in this collection. Instead of using these genres to his advantage, he comfortably elected to use them for the sake of what he himself described as 'violent and anthemic style'. It is as if he made the record for his sheer pretentious amusement, as if he were to say that the record was made to be propoganda against the establishment and common consensus. Being a metalhead for many years, I've been exposed to some of the most gruesome, ghastly and inaudiable records from many artists of many genres - ranging anywhere between the most obscure of Black Metal, to the most obscene Grindcore and Noise. Though I've never quite expereienced a pain such as this record.

Let alone the fact that no instrument, including his own vocals, were used properly and on par with eachother, the production was so ear-puncturing bad, it was as if it was delibate to damage the listener's eardrums; at times, the different layers of vocals, which were all different in style from eachother, overlapped to create what I can only describe as 'inaudiable screams'. Most instruments were pooly placed in the mix - the bass was always way too high, the guitars were always distorted to oblivion, and the drums... let's just say that if Austin's inability to keep his coordination between his hands and feet balanced wasn't bad enough, the production on the drums sounded like he played them in a medieval prison chamber's bathroom, while the showers were running around the drumset.

No words can express how difficult it was to reach track number three, let alone the entire orchestration. It really does make one wonder, who "No Good To Anyone" was made for?, as I can't imagine a fan of neither Black Metal, Shoegaze Noise nor Psychadelic Rock happily sit through the entire piece, without causing a tantrum. I really tried giving this record a chance, I really did, but at the end of the day, I decided not to be apologetic over my own thoughts, and this record sure did stir those up like a wildfire.