Wet Girls and Other Funny Tales

Honeybombs

Released on April 13 this year, "Wet Girls and Other Funny Tales" is the debut […]
By Harry Green
September 25, 2017
Honeybombs - Wet Girls and Other Funny Tales album cover

Released on April 13 this year, "Wet Girls and Other Funny Tales" is the debut album by Roman rockers HONEYBOMBS, born in 2012. I will freely admit to being pleasantly surprised by the quality here. It's not highbrow, but it's not indolent rubbish either. I expected some impressively sleazy hair metal (amusingly, the label describe them as "Italian sleaze rockers") or some bone-stock Southern backwash that somehow augurs rave reviews, but it's entirely different.

The album strongly reminds me of PAIN, a band I can't intellectually justify liking but which play an energetic and generic style of heavy/power metal that appeals for its straightforward catchiness. HONEYBOMBS' album has a basic 80's influence with some modern style and much tidier production. The three openers, particularly "Brazzers Dot Com" put me in mind of PAIN's "Call Me". That being said, the vocals sound a bit muffled and hesitant. Maybe it's the singer trying to get away with mumbling the hilariously boorish lyrics, but I'd prefer they be bellowed. If you're going to put burlesque Rebel Wilson on the album cover, don't concern yourself with being presentable. A band singing inept explicit middle-school fanfics would elicit quite a chuckle from me, especially with the singer's extremely evident Italian accent. As it is, the token shrieks vaguely resembling death growls are relatively funny.

"We Are Gonna Kick Your Ass" is an unironically enjoyable song. I wouldn't have trusted anything with that title even if it had come from some bonafide badasses like PERSUADER or STRAPPING YOUNG LAD, but it's not bad. The intro riff is particularly good, and I'm surprised that I don't hate the pop-punk drum rhythm. "Oh My God" also has a nice crisp riff at the 1:05 mark that I'd expect in a BLIND GUARDIAN song, although as is the case with opener "Radical Shit", the production badly neuters the backing vocals on the chorus, which severely undercuts the otherwise prevalent gusto. "Six Pack on Your Back" has a better balancing and is probably the best-produced song here. Their cover of "Maniac" by Michael Sembello seems a bit tone-deaf; the band could have stood to vary the song's texture more rather than to remain at full volume throughout.

The album feels a little unsubstantial, but I imagine HONEYBOMBS put on a good live show. "Wet Girls and Other Funny Tales" is fun and unpretentious without being a worthless lazy callback to hackneyed bygones. I'm interested to see what the band produce next.

7 / 10

Good

Songwriting

7

Musicianship

6

Memorability

6

Production

7
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"Wet Girls and Other Funny Tales" Track-listing:

1. Radical Shit
2. Brazzers Dot Com
3. Fat Girls Are Goin' Mad
4. G.R.A.B. (Ghetto Ratchet Ass Bitch)
5. Don't Wanna Be Like Johnny
6. Till The Night Is Over
7. We Are Gonna Kick Your Ass
8. Oh My God!
9. Sweet Little Dummy
10. Six Pack On Your Back
11. Maniac

Honeybombs Lineup:

Andrew Skid - Lead Vocals
Alex Rotten - Guitars, Harsh Vocals
Helias Marson - Lead Guitars & Backing Vocals
Luke Vanilla - Bass Guitar
Fabulous Fab - Drums

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